I want to start this of by saying that I talk about some serious stuff in this. To any Mods reading this, If you have time, please read this through. I hope that you can see that I am being genuine and just can't find a better way of contacting Gosia. A few days ago, I published my story about how I realized that I am a Pleadian starseed and then I realized just how common it probably was for people to be saying that just because they want something. I know I can't do anything to prove otherwise but for the sake of understanding, can you please accept the idea?
   In the past few days a lot has happened. Like I said, I talk about some dark stuff in this. Suicidal thoughts and even plans, so read this at your own discretion. Recently I have been in my head quite a bit. I was feeling that I had lost interest in being a human. I had what, in my opinion, was completely sound reasoning to not continue my incarnation any longer. I thought to myself that, if from a higher plain, everything is how it should be, and if everything is completely preplanned from a higher level, then why should I bother trying to make a difference in the 3D matrix, If you don't do anything, that's exactly what was going to happen all along and there would be no point in feeling bad or trying to change it. At the same time, if it's not worth trying to make a difference, what's the point anyway?
   At the same time, I was thinking of the video, Lets be our higher self now. This is one of my favorite videos of Cosmic Agency's, but recently I had been thinking about it and I was I couldn't help but think. If suffering is not necessary for growth, why be in a world so full of suffering? Instead of being here, I could be in a world full of free knowledge and an amazing life in comparison to earth. I could return home and just study everything there was to study there. And I could get out sooner rather than later.
   I know that that is not at all a healthy mindset to have, but I had been so disconnected to the 3D world through all of covid and waking up, I was only interested in the highest points of view. If it discovered a new perspective on something, I then took that as my new reality and basically ignored anything lower than that on the subject. I got to the point where I didn't think much at all about what was going on in 3D. I honestly didn't even have interested in being here on Earth anymore.
   At first it was just, "I'm not afraid of dieing at all." then, "I wouldn't mind dieing."  After a while I got kind of obbsessed with the idea of the Pleadians coming down to take me away from here. The night I discovered I was a starseed, when I saw many ships in the sky that I mentioned in my last post, I was outside from 9:00 p.m. to 3:00 a.m. I spent that night trying my best to use the day of 11/11/2020 to magnify my intention to be taken away. After that I just took a nosedive, I began thinking of the inevitability that everything that is going to happen and used that to start justifying the idea of my killing myself to leave this incarnation.
   Earlier tonight, I genuinely made plans to float out into the middle of a lake on a stolen air mattress with a backpack full of rocks and once in the middle of the lake, popping it under me and everything sinking to the bottom, leaving no trace while simultaneously hiding my body so it looked like I just went missing.
   There where many times that I would go outside and look at the sky. I would think about the fact that there where Pleiadians in orbit right now that could here me speaking to them. I have no idea how many times I looked at the sky and thought 'What is the point of even being here? I don't see how this life in the 3D matrix could be worth it when it's not necessary to go through suffering to grow spiritually. I really don't want to try to put pressure on you, but please help me understand why I should stay here. I don't understand any reason right now and I won't be here for much longer like this. Please, If you're willing, I don't know how you can get in contact with me, but please contact me as soon as you can in the most direct way you can.' I was kind of expecting that, if they did contact me it would likely be through telepathy. At one point I did bring up the idea the idea of contacting Swaruu, but I never expected them to actually contact you and explain it through you.
   My dad and I where hanging out and he mentioned that you had a new video out. Apparently my internet blocked it because it is from a school and it blocks a lot of things. Immediately, when I read the title, I realized that this was a direct response to me. Every second I got further into the video I resonated with it more and more. I could genuinely feel her talking directly to me. Everything she said was exactly what I needed to hear. I can so clearly feel that I am not the same as before I watched this video.
   Thank you so much Gosia and every soul involved in getting me this message. This has genuinely been one of the most amazing and validating experiences I've had in my life. I truly do feel reinvigorated with life and motivation. I feel so much more grounded then I have in what feels like forever.